When revenge becomes my favorite obsession, it’s time for some vengeance-themed entertainment. I prefer to spend my cash and energy on spa days as an alternative to plotting the next ill-conceived chapter of my life. But be warned! All the descriptions below are like my hair – filled with SPOILERS!
Hamlet by William Shakespeare Translated by Kent C. Richmond
The king of Denmark is dead. The queen has quickly married her brother-in-law. The queen and the dead-king’s son is not handling any of this very well. Mood stabilizers and anti-psychotic medications might be able to save this family from a tragic end but they’re going to be invented a few hundred years too late.
If Hamlet has previously bored you, try watching Rosencrantz & Guildenstern Are Dead. The tragedians are creepy enough for The Twilight Zone. Richard Dreyfuss is morbidly amusing in a “Never leave the kids alone with Uncle Eerie” way.
Mockingjay by Suzanne Collins
The first rule of vengeance is to determine who really deserves to star in your retribution fantasies. Hint: Your enemies lie but President Snow never does. Revile him in Hunger Games and Catching Fire but in Mockingjay, Snow reveals Panem is already a dark Wonderland with his “we’re all mad here” warning to Katniss.
Fight Club by Chuck Palahniuk
If your boss is the focus of your revenge fantasies, this book is for you and your imaginary ally. Jack manages to get his buffoon of a boss to finance his new career helping faceless minimum wage workers get revenge on the miserable middle management in their lives. Fun twist: Jack’s alter ego, Tyler gets revenge on Jack as a parting gift/finger flip.
May I recommend against ordering the cream soup … ever again?
The Princess Bride by William Goldman
Twoo wove, or true love, is prepared only on special occasions but just desserts can be found on the menu every day. Buttercup feels betrayed by Westley after he is killed and captured by pirates. I didn’t say she was the brightest crayon in the box. Her new hubby then tries to start a war using her as the bait. Everyone in this book gets revenge on someone by the end of the story like in The Purge. True satisfaction.
Matilda by Roald Dahl
There’s nothing better than a delightful five-year-old getting revenge on her cruel principal. Matilda succeeds where everyone else in fiction fails. Example: See Hamlet.
Reel Special Bonus: Sordid Lives 11 episodes & 1 movie
What’s great about the emotionally unstable getting revenge is not only do they succeed but everyone gets some deep fried eternal peace. Thirty years ago Brother Boy was committed by his family for his homosexuality, and the Tammy Wynette impersonations were just the icing on his already fashion forward cake. Now, the ghost of Tammy Wynette (played by Tammy Wynette’s daughter) is visiting Brother Boy and it’s time for him to bust out of the hoosegow!
Kill Bill Vol. 1 & 2
It’s a tawdry Scorned Love romance. It’s a classic Asian Revenge flick. Bill’s bringing the coke and there’s plenty of cheese to go on all the pizzas at your vengeance party!
Pro Tip: Anyone deserving your wrath is already sowing their seeds of self-destruction. Remember to cover your back as you find a place away from the flying shrapnel.